KiriKyuki ♥

Friday, May 25, 2012Y

Emotional Post..

"You think that they are happy, but deep down they are just hiding their pain..
You think that they won't mind at all, when actually they are already hurt by your action..
You think that they won't get sad, when they cry everyday at home..
You think that they can be step on, when actually they don't wanna make the situation worst..
You think that it's ok to bully them, when actually they cant do anything to defend..
You think that it's ok to let them do everything, when actually they did it for your convenient..
You think that it's ok to let them do it cause you don't know how to, but they find it annoying yet they just wouldn't say anything..
You think that it's ok since she is my friend, she will do anything for me, when actually all she wanted was for you to figure it out on your own that she want you to be independent and know your limit..
You thought of all that, But you guess wrong.."

As seen at the top of this, you guessed it! another emotional post..
Sorry..i guess i'm really known for having emotional blog post, but i guess sometimes you feel like this too..
Not going to say much, but im just gonna say this..

"Everything that i ever done, i never once said a word or complain..
I kept all our promise, yet you don't.. to you it might not be important..but it's ok
I tried my best to do things and get them, but all you can't wait..
You were right, you care about yourself..
I thought i was the one who changed so i tried to be someone better..
Now i realize that it wasn't me at all..
You were never being fair to me, like the toy we said to play together..
No matter how much i want to play with mine, i still think for you..
But you don't.. I didn't say much, cause i thought the more the merrier..
I appreciate the things you bought for me..but i kinda regretted having you give it to me..
I rather return you everything..
If only you realize that you have been relying too much on me and its time to be independent..
I would be grateful..seriously..
The way you talk sometimes, its either too loud or too rude..
You don't know that yourself..Sometimes i tried to bear it but in vain..
You always thought, but you were always wrong..
You always complain..but i dont mind and never said a word cause to me, you are just excited..
You said you will try and change, but your change just took a wrong turn..
The thing i hate most is getting misunderstand, yet you didnt apologize..
Sometimes talking to you, we end up shouting and just make each other piss..
I tried many ways to tolerate and i'm kinda glad i can make it this far..
Sometime i even think i rather go solo..Cause i'm doing most of the work as you were lazy..
You didn't want this or that..and sometimes i regret following you..
But i just treat it as us going through thick and thin..
Sometimes the thing you say..you don't even think before you speak..
It doesn't hurt you, but it does to me..
I won't mind not even being with you if you are still gonna be like this..
I can't be the one tolerating this nonsense forever..
Although i really like us to be together till old..But if its like this than there isn't any point..
All i want to say is i enjoy our time together, but if it just continue like this..forget it."

ends at 1:52 AM

Wednesday, April 25, 2012Y

Life is always hard.

Hey im back and woah...NEW BLOG FUNCTION O__O haha that shows how long i have not been in here =w=b

Anyway, im sorry for not coming in here frequently and update my blog and all but i'll try to make an effort to post something at least once a month or more :3

So a picture up there to make you smile ^^ haha me as baby miku :3

So im here today to talk about life...it seems that we all suffered through something hard on our way of life and today i just read an article about how this girl thinks about life..She said that in life there isn't any smooth pathway and no one likes difficult situation..That's why we have to concur this fear like we always do and hop over a bad situation..
For example, you had a small fight with your friends, but in the end you made up. That is what i meant by you concuring your fear! You had a bad time but in the end it turn out good..that is how you go on with life, though it takes time and no one is perfect to get over it in a minute, but you still manage to reach that goal !
I had fight with my friends too andthey are my best friends. Although sometime we dont really agree with one another, we still tried to get along and accept each other's way. Recently i fought with one of my besties and i just cant stop thinking of our past 4 years tgt being happy and all..its so hard and than she made the first move cause i was stubborn =w= but i really love all of my besties~ and i want to be with them till old !

Life is short, though it seems long. You may have your doubts on your friend and all but hey, friends care and people care to. They dont show it out but deep down they really do and that is what makes the world going. Life is just that interesting..

Many times i told myself to give up, but many times my heart says not to. If i do, i fail as a person and i fail as my parents' child. I fail in everything and i dont want that.. Everyone is born a champion ! Whether you are famous or not. A life is just so interesting and we should be grateful we have a blissful life. Having limbs and a complete family while others dont..so if they can live a happy life without all this, why cant we?

They move on in life and therefore obtain happiness..This is life. An answer only you yourself know :)

ends at 5:40 AM

Wednesday, March 7, 2012Y

That guy up there..he is a famous cosplayer named, kaname and im blogging about this today is because...

I DREAMT OF HIM AND IT WAS SO FREAKING REAL !!!!

So it all started that i went to his concert at a convention, it was before a cosplay event and somehow i was invited there to have a look at it with my good friend, Youichi (my twinny changed name from ushio ) :3

So we were walking and i saw this red curtain, we walk towards it and KANAME came out !!!!

We were stunned and just stare at him, dumbfounded.

He walk over to us and started speaking in japanese, luckily i understand what he was saying.

I took out my iPhone and rush to him asking for a picture (in japanese) and he gladly accept it.

I asked Twinny to help take my picture with him, at first we were doing simple poses and he think that it wasn't that good.

So he held his hand around my waist and i did that too~ (>///<)

After that, he said that it still wasn't good enough, so he made me faced him and held my waist while our heads are together~ I blushed even more!

And then, with the last pose, he kissed my forehead and smile at me !!!! ohmotherofgod !

He told us he have some stuff to attend and said that he would catch up with us, and so he left.

And then we went home..hoping to see him at the event tomorrow.

After my bath, i heard a knock at my door and saw him STANDING RIGHT OUTSIDE OF MY HOUSE!

In a shocked, I rushed to my room and grabbed a pen and a paper and rushed back to get his signature~

The first one he signed was really nice~ but then he said that it wasn't perfect and so he signed again~

He started talking to me and we had a lovely time chatting ^_^

After that, his security came and said that its time for him to go and with a sad expression on his face he said

"Ja, sayonara..Anata mo migi no ashita kite iru ne?" meaning "Goodbye...you are coming tomorrow too right

"Hai! Watashi ga sanka shite kudasai yo! Ashita anata o sanshō shite kudasai.! Meaning "Yes! i'll be sure to attend! see you tomorrow"

And then, i woke up TAT

It was such a nice dream and i wanna see what happen the next day :( oh well~

As long as i have that! i'm happy now :D

ends at 5:56 PM

Friday, February 17, 2012Y

A dream i had that reminded me of something..

So i had this dream...it was..kinda weird but at the same time it reminded me of something...

It's a pretty long one so if you are those who love lonely story..than read this :)

Its quite a sad story for me :(

" A girl i saw...she was just an average normal looking girl..nothing was special about her..maybe for her hobbies.

She was a very cheerful girl, her face was always smiling like the sun, no sadness can be seen in her.

But than...her life started changing and darkness overtook her.

She said she despise her friends, who never thought of her feelings.

Than she said again, ' But i love them for them for making me....ME.'

'I hated them....for not caring about me..'

'But i love them..for making me laugh.'

But the darkness was so strong..this time she said, ' Now...I despise them more than ever.'

She know that deep down..none of her friends understand her as well as she, who make an effort, does to them.

She felt that her friends thinks that the world revolves only around them.

She wanted to be a little selfish, but it seems that she is being a whole lot selfish.

When she's hurt...no one goes near her to console her, none passes through her barrier.

When she tried to hint her sadness..they pretended not to see or hear a thing, even if they did..they just agreed and none of their words are consoling..

When she ask for a little, it just seems like she just asked the impossible.

She never wanted to be the one who decides things for her friends..she wanted them all to decide..together.

She hate choosing in fact..she wanted everyone to agree and at least gives suggestion..

She never wanted to be 'the leader'.

She wanted to tell them the truth..her true feelings..but it was impossible.

In fact, she hated gossiping, but how can she not gossip when her friends keep doing it..so she followed.

She hate to do something bad..but how can she when her friends are doing it.

She was afraid to lose her friends..she was very afraid that they hate her..so she did what she have to do..and that is to follow.

All she wanted was a carefree life..just like before, she was tired..ever so tired.

No one really cared about her..they just assume.

When her friends are out, she didnt want to follow, hoping that they will drag her out..but none did so..

All she wanted was her friends dragging her out to play..that's all she ever wanted, her friends to make the first move.

But it seems impossible.

She wanted to be with them..a part of them..but could not.

She had a close friend, but she does the same..just replied with a word with nothing consoling.

Practically, she was being ignored.

To others it seems only like a small matter.

She was tired..oh so ever tired..

Of course she didnt kill herself..but everything remains the same..it just scarred her heart even more..

No one knows what will happen to her..and no one ever does, cause none really care.

So that's how she live.. continuously.."

So basically that is how the story went :( poor girl....reminded me of something too..

reminded me of..........oh well, nothing big anyway..

So i hope you like this weird dream of mine, sounds drama though haha xD

Bye :D

ends at 5:11 AM

Monday, February 6, 2012Y

A tiring day indeed.

This is what i feel like doing now, float and just stay underwater listening to everything that is happening in there.

I feeling tired, way too tired to move and think.

Since i'm having my second national exam this year, i tend to get tired every single day.

wanted to rest in the afternoon but.....i was always occupied or distracted.

This year, i feel unwanted by friends and families.

I feel alone and unappreciated. By things i do for my friends and things i did for my family.

It seems like no one really cares about me and i;m just a person who can be used and toss away when not needed.

But some of my friends tend to appreciate me, not all but some.

I'm really getting tired of this life, i want to move on and not stay in this state forever.

Things i do for others sometimes seems like a bother and a nuisance, no one really find it helpful.

I tend to be an annoyance to others sometime too, sad life i know.

So now, i'm trying my best to cheer myself up by thinking who cares if no one really appreciate me and who cares if they just toss me aside when i'm not needed.

I should just have some fun on my own and enjoy every bit of life, though i seriously wanna try something new for once in my life.

Anyway, i'm feeling real tired of everything and i'm heading to bed as soon as i have digested my food.

So....Bye :D

ends at 4:29 AM

Monday, January 2, 2012Y

A sad day today dechuu o3o

Exactly as what the title said (｡＞0＜｡)
Was being called out by the teacher due to my light brown hair （Ｔ＿Ｔ）
It was supposedly natural looking but than mother dye it to a brown that is suppose to be darker but end up to a lighter brown instead!
So i can't attend school just for today and my hair was never this black!
I look older now ( p_q)
I am not a bad kid! I just want to try new things in my life!
But this is sort of an experience too, so it's ok ^^
At least i get to rest a day more since i'm sick too （‐＾▽＾‐）
Watching anime and playing game is the way of life~~~ for now (￣∇￣+)
Hopefully they accept this hair color now and i can enjoy my horrible school life xD
That's all for today~ Bye! (*^o^*)/~

ends at 8:20 PM

Sunday, January 1, 2012Y

Happy New Year !!

Sorry for not and i mean NOT posting for such a long time in my blog ><

Was real busy especially with work and preparing for school, Christmas and everything!

But now i'm free and feeling bored xD

After some time i won't be as free as i am now since i have to focus on my next important national exam x.x

Oh well, i haven been getting my new cos yet but i'll DEFINITELY post it here when i got them ~~~

it's an exciting thing to get them *w*

Maybe i have to make my stocking sword a little shorter as it keeps drooping forward =/

better fix it before i get real busy xD

That's all i guess...OH YES !

I receive my dollfie~ originally her name was pitts but i change it to himeka xD she's a good lovely doll

I need to get new clothes and wig for her though x.x

HAHA ~ oh well that's all for today ^^ Bye ~

Forgot to say that i went for an event on 17 dec and perform there >w<

here's the link if you wanna watch :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6i-lsJSr8Ts&list=FLC2qSVgAmksR2bV5I3RhcDA&index=10&feature=plpp_video

For your info I'm the one in black and twinny is the white one :D

Please support our fan page 8D

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hime-Kuroshi-Usagi/265227670185782

Thank you xD

ends at 2:01 AM